Enter the dragon

Welcome back Ninja Fans,

This latest blog is proudly brought to you by the People’s Republic of China. I was lucky enough to spend a few days there with my folks and below are some handy tips in no particular order if you ever go to the land of the dragon

Travel tip # 1  -- Taxis are an experience not to be missed. I was not able to pronounce many of their names….. so called them RickyBobby instead. I guess we should have counted ourselves lucky that there were seats in the back. I hear seatbelts are overrated anyway. Needless to say, they went fast, when in doubt went faster and when braking stood on the horn (how dare someone get in the way of them going fast!)

Travel tip #2 -- Concierges don’t stay concierges for long if they give shoddy advice. Listen to what they have to say.

The following day we were keen to see the Forbidden City and Tiananmen Square, the concierge was kind enough to advise we either taxi or train as it was a little too far to walk (around 5-6kms). I won’t name names, but there were 1-2 amongst us who having seen the map of the city felt ‘it couldn’t be that far as it was so close on the map’…….. it was only later that I discovered said map did not have a scale. In any case feeling brave we decided to walk so as to get a better appreciation of the city……..

Tiananmen Square didn't look same without the tanks

OH&S anyone?

We blended right in.....

The Chairman

Fancy a spot of ball inside the Forbidden City

Hello LilyPad @ the summer palace

A man-made lake dug out for the Emperors mum..... She might have been high maintenance

The dirt from the lake made the hill in the back right.
This was well before any sort of digging machines....... oh and unions

Travel tip #3 -- They drive on the right hand side of the road. The first car that will hit you comes from the left.

I had never given it much thought, but as it happens in China, the cars drive on the right, just like the US, Europe etc. There were several near misses with some of us looking to cross a road and not seeing a turning vehicle as we were looking the other way. Thankfully the locals weren’t afraid to blow use their horns. I liked to think the horns were actually saying hello. We had lots of people saying ‘hello’ to us!

Travel tip #4 -- Disregard travel tip #3, traffic ‘laws’ are guidelines at best and usually disregarded.  The first car that hits you will be the one mounting the curb to bypass a traffic obstruction.

Awesome!

merging issues?

Junior called 'shotgun' -- and then found out they were taking the  vesper

At least we know who the little spoon is!

Better take a photo of those merging issues!

The only way to walk around Beijing is in numbers. Get separated from the ‘herd’ and become a casualty. 5 is just enough to have some sort of safety, but some roads require at least a group of 10, even when you are crossing on the ‘walk’ cycle. Some would say the ‘walk’ cycle is when there is enough peer pressure amongst the pedestrians to get the brave/foolish ones to step out. On a serious note I draw the line at vespers, motorcycles, trikes and cars driving on the sidewalk and I have lost count of the number of near misses we had on sidewalks with motor bikes and vespers the main offenders. Do a youtube search for ‘beijing traffic’ and you will see what I mean.

 As an aside the government have initiated a clever little program designed to minimise car traffic within the CBD. Essentially cars are only allowed to drive if their number plate ends in a specific number. 2 numbers are excluded each day, mon-fri and the days rotated (not dissimilar to the watering days in Perth). If drivers are found in breach (by any number of cameras) they get the bejesus fined out of them. A genius idea if public transport is up to scratch!

Travel tip # 5 -- Everyone is going to try and sell you something. We went on several tours to see the main touristy sights. Every second stop on these tours was a factory, warehouse or flea market of some description. I appreciate the guides need to make a few bucks but you get over it pretty quickly especially as much of the stuff looks exactly the same!

One of the 'factories'......... anyone want to play domino's?

Roughly 70 min into our ‘Beijing city appreciation’ walk (see travel tip #2), Mother and Aunty Jill started talking to a chatty young ‘art student’ who had very good English. He said we could call him Bruce……… We enjoyed an 45 min delay walking with Bruce to the uni to see some of his art…….. and we were ‘lucky’ enough to be able to buy some. I am still not sure if he was a genuine artist or whether he sold us some other guys paintings. At the time we were just happy we hadn't been kidnapped, mugged or otherwise!

'Bruce' in the bright blue shirt -- it's the little ones you gotta look out for!

Travel tip #6 -- Typhoons do happen, no I haven't experienced one yet. On the day we were to return to the Japan, a sod of a typhoon decided to visit Tokyo. This initially delayed and then cancelled our flight. The earliest we could rebook was for 2 days later which meant we were to miss out on the Sumo tourney :( 

We also discovered perhaps the HARDEST damn mattresses in China. There was more give in the floorboards than on those damn things!

On the plus side at least we didn't take off, get within spitting distance of Tokyo, have several aborted attempts at landing due to wind and then have to fly another 2hrs to Sapporo like my Aunt and Uncle had to. In addition, the extra day meant we were able to go to Beijing Zoo and check out the Panda's! (who weren't as excited to see us as we were them!). With reference to travel tip #5 when we were heading Beijing zoo on our own, we were met with a look of astonishment and then a curse ‘independent travellers’ *spit* by a lady at the airport who was trying to sell us a tour with her! (and we didn't accept her offer!)

Stretching before aerobics

We are going for 1 situp Champ... you can do it!

 No he can't!

Hasn't quite mastered 'hide and seek'

Travel tip #7 -- China has a some pretty amazing sight to offer. The fence to keep the rabbits out is impressive (even though most of it is not the original fence any more) and the mind boggles as to the work that would have gone into its construction.

No rabbits allowed!

we didnt see any....

In addition the terracotta warriors are also amazing given their age and number. A good portion of the warriors have been left buried so as to preserve them until 'better technology' becomes available. It took them digging up the first two pits and however many thousand statues before realising the colour paint on them was oxidising in the air in under 60 minutes. Thankfully they have left almost an entire pit of statues buried in hope that when they do finally excavate them they can preserve the colour

Pit #1 -- I think the Emperor might have had some insecurity issues

Pit #2 -- waiting to dig the rest of it up....

I don't feel this blog has done justice to the week we spent in China. I also took roughly 1000 photo's and it was a task to judge which ones to put in! On the whole, I don't think I will be going back to Beijing anytime soon... but it certainly was a new experience for us and I am glad to have been......

In any case, I will now try and blog about the 2 weeks we had with my folks in Japan (I am not putting a time frame on it :P)

Toys of the week/month

Simple things for simple minds I guess.......

here are the latest offerings. I would ask my loyal readers to vote on the best toy if there was such an option on this blog........

Offering #1
The Chinese PeePee Boy;
We came across this wonderful little thing in (of all places) China. It is supposed to be a test of whether the water is too hot to make tea out of.... personally I think some men got rip roaring drunk one night and thought that this would be a really cool idea......

The 'Terracotta Warriors' China should be known for!

I dare say some of my viewers would agree that at least the aim of the little guy is realistic....

Offering #2
Remote control helicopter;
A tried and tested favourite, this puppy was acquired from Electric town. The video of the flight was taken before I had earn't my wings. Rest assured I can now hover with the best of them and have been working on stalking Kate up and down the halls.........

Like I said..... simple things :)

Toys of the week...

Welcome Ninja Fans,

View of the main 'hall'

Friday was another of the WHAG outings – this time devoted to checking out the Ramen Museum. It was a bit of odd set up and not really that interesting, but it certainly was worth the trip for the bowls of ramen! Also while there our picture was taken by a pro photographer who was taking shots to celebrate one of the stores 10yr anniversary book. Hopefully in November or thereabouts I will find said book in the stores J

Fascinating stuff.....

The weekend then saw Kate and I attack the ‘Kitchen Warehouse’ district of Tokyo. The warehouse comprises a street several kilometres long and is lined with stores for everything to do with kitchens – ranging from the humble tin opener (which we needed) to tables with built in bbq (Korean style) all the way to plastic food.

How would you like that pasta?

The train trip there was without issue (no friendly Indians offering back rubs nor backpacks getting stuck in the door) and only took us about 30 min in total from Yokohama to the north side of Tokyo.

On our shopping list was (as mentioned) a tin opener, a whisk, a masher and a Bamix/hand blender/food processor thingymabob.

What on earth do we need those for I hear you ask, well last week I embarked upon some cooking adventures and made a soup which needed to be pulverised. Let me assure any fans out there that you can make broccoli soup taste A1 (especially if you add cream and extra cheese).

Anyway back to shopping….. as you can see by the pics of our purchases, we may have got a little distracted. The cake tin is awesome – Dad, Sammie and Cussy I think the days of you carving funky shapes out for birthday cakes is over or at least if the boys want cars….. there was also a train one, but Kate said I could only choose one :( 

Some of the purchases

I also really wanted a vegetable chopping knife so we trawled through several shops before finding this little gem. The real clincher was when they said they would engrave my name on the knife for free and it would only take 2 mins. They really should have asked my name before saying that, coz it took the poor guy about 10 minutes to transcribe it to Kanji and then another 10 to engrave. After all that we have no idea whether it is actually my name but it makes for a good story!

for the lack of a better word...... AWESOME!!

Your name is WHAT??!

At 4:50am on Sunday morning we were awoken by a ‘smallish’ aftershock of about 6.5 I think. I still don’t know when the shakes become quakes in their own right, but this one was classified as an aftershock. In any case it ruined our sleep as the rocking isn’t as soothing as it was when we were little tots!

Sunday lunchtime we went for a short ride to do some more shopping only to discover it was, ‘bring your pet to the shop day’. I must remember to take Kate shopping on this day more often as Kate’s affinity for all creatures great and small ensures the shopping is over much quicker than usual!

Until next time….

Rugby

Welcome back Ninja Fans,

July 2^nd saw Kate and I venture to Chichibunomiya Rugby Stadium, the ‘spiritual’ home of Japanese rugby. They were to play Samoa as part of the IRB Pacific nations tournament (our equivalent of the tri-nations).

Not having followed the Cherry Blossoms previously, we had no idea how the game would go, but were hopeful our adopted team would have a win.

A sinking feeling descended upon us when we saw the starting lineups. The standard size for the Samoans was about 190cm and 100kgs (+10cm +10kgs for a lock and +15kgs for the props) and all could run like the clappers (the props for only 15m though). 

Not much difference in size at all

The poor Japanese were not as physically imposing at all, their locks were actually 2 naturalised Poms (we think) as was one of their centres and their half back? 

Spot the dirty little scrum half...

With the exception of these chaps, the Japanese players prob averaged 175-180cm and about 85kgs. Don't get me wrong, they were quick little sods, but quick only gets you so far for so long.

Oh nu! I'm beeched as bru!

In any case, the opening 3 minutes saw one of the Samoan backs run directly at a pack of 4 Cherry Blossoms who were scattered like a bunch of pins hit by a 15 pound bowling ball. Not to long after a similar play happened and the home side were looking at a drubbing. It also didnt help that the two of the naturalised players who were taking the shots at goal for the home side had delusions of grandeur and they werent even close to making the distance on their first 3 penalty attempts!

Good hit -- not sure about the angle of the props necks though

To their credit they adjusted their style of play (one would dive at the legs, not trying to tackle, just tangle and 3 would jump on the back to effect the tackle) and were looking to stage an unlikely come from behind win when I put the mocker on them and suggested to Kate that 9pts was not all that much to reel in with about 20 mins in hand.

Needless to say traffic was one way after that and they lost  by about 20pts.

Perhaps not the most stylish, but that skirt sure looked comfy

Despite the result, a good night was had by us and we look forward to the Blossoms play USA in a few weeks!

Rookie Mistakes 101

This week also saw me venture into Tokyo to apply for a tourist visa to visit China in September with my folks. I got off to a relatively early start (for me) and was out the door by about 0930. I reached Tokyo by 0950 and it was at 0951 that my day went the shape of a giant pear.

Firstly, some tips for young players dealing with the transport system here;

1) Never lose concentration when wandering the maze of a station and don’t be afraid to check you are on the right platform, going the right way. Several times if need be!

2) Never wear a bag/backpack in the train if you can avoid it. Always try and have it in hand in front of you.

3) Never  be afraid about packing the scrum a little tighter – there is ALWAYS room to fit another person in, just be prepared to invade someone elses personal space (or lose your own).

4) Never think you will be okay walking around in 33C/80% humidity

As you may have surmised;

1) I lost concentration

2) I did not have my back pack in hand

3) I didn’t pack the scrum as tight as needed, valuing my personal space too much

4) I walked around in 33C/80% humidity.

This resulted in a catastrophic chain of events that ruined my morning and went something like this…. Firstly I got onto the train going the opposite direction to what I needed for no other reason apart from the fact I was in lala land.  Essentially this would not have been an issue…

BUT

I also did not have my backpack in hand, so when I managed to squeeze onto the wrong train I was not able to see if I had cleared the door. Again not a big issue…..

UNLESS

You don’t pack the scrum as tight as you need to and a clip of your back pack ends up getting caught on the other side of the doors, effectively trapping your bag and bar cutting said clip off the bag, you ‘aint going anywhere til the doors open again. At this point I was not overly worried as I figured 2-3 stops, maybe 5 in a worst case scenario ‘my’ doors would open and she’d be alright.

Unfortunately, 13 stops and 45 min later instead of being a stones throw from the embassy I was on the opposite side of Tokyo.  With about 90 minutes before the embassy closed for the day. ‘Not happy Jan’ doesn’t really do my frustration justice. Credit to those nearby me on the train though -- either they didn't notice me getting progressively redder and more and more pissed off, or more likely had sufficient control not to piss themselves laughing at my expense (as I am sure most of you would have done)

Needless to say once I was free, (I felt like James Franco) I experienced a euphoria that normally only comes with extreme blood loss and/or malnutrition but was able to duck, dive, dodge and dip to a station near the embassy.

With 30 min to go before closing the ‘Mr Glass half full’ inside of me was brimming with confidence that I was only 15min walk from the embassy. Unfortunately the 15 min walk turned out to be about 25min walk as there were some hideous hills involved. Oh and not a small amount of perspiration too. At 1150, Mr ‘Glass half empty’ promptly took the glass and found an uncomfortable place to put it. I don’t think we will be hearing from Mr ‘Glass half full’ any time soon.

The following morning I decided to try again and this time with surgical precision I was able to locate said embassy (ironically it had a really big wall), apply for my visa and retreat to a/c comfort having only lost 5kgs of sweat (vs the 10kgs lost the day before). Easy once you know how!

We're not tiny nor toony, we are a little loony

Welcome back Ninja Fans!

This latest weekend saw us go for a leisurely bike ride on the Saturday and a trip to Tokyo Disney on the Sunday. The weather here is a lot different to what we are both used to….. it never seems to get too hot, however the humidity that is the norm always makes me feel like the guy from this ad;

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qdK9zSl2cgE

Needless to say as soon as I actually start doing any sort of outdoor exercise this issue is exaggerated 10 fold.

In any case the bike ride was quite pleasant and was a good introduction into the ‘road rules’ (they are not really rules, more like guidelines). Needless to say we now know that any more than 6” between bikes travelling in opposite directions is more than sufficient….. some might say that is a paddock! Another handy tip was that sticking to the left as you go round a blind corner is optional and if you want to swing really really wide then you should feel free to do so. I am tempted to buy a ‘hero’ cam and mount it on my helmet so we can document any potential near misses we have!

Sunday was an early start as we wanted to get a jump on the crowds at Tokyo Disney. The ticket booth opens at 8am and we were pretty happy to be there by 815ish (given it is roughly 60min of train to get there from Yokohama). What we hadn’t taken into consideration were the 8000 other people that had the same idea as us…… Still we were pretty happy to only be 75m from the ticketing booth and the hour wait to get tickets was spent admiring the various fashions on display.

Before we go any further it is time for a brief history lesson. I am not a fan of roller coasters. My first experience was with one of my cousins at the Perth Royal Show….. the ‘Mighty Mouse’ as I believe it was called was not a good introduction as the car in front of us as well as 2 behind had some track issues on the first corner which resulted in several collisions – some poor sod had to climb up the side of the structure and realign our wheels to get us all moving again. Not my favourite memory. My second experience was at Australia’s Wonderland in Sydney with some other cousins….. I don’t actually remember the ride itself, only how small the damn seats were and the bruises I had on my knees from them being crushed. I think it might be fair to say I don’t rate them highly.

Imagine my horror when my acrophobic, claustrophobic wife who also suffers from motion sickness informs me that our first stop is a dirty great big rollercoaster called Space Mountain, wonderful! Apparently I spent the ride questioning the meaning of life and swearing my rocks off. I remember having the terrible sensation of only just missing overhead supports as it was pitch black and we couldn’t see a damn thing! (for the record Kate spent the ride screaming – at least I am 90% sure it was Kate and not me!)

By this stage the crowds had well and truly arrived and we were faced with at least 70min waits for any of the popular rides. To kill time we did the mad hatters tea cup and I nearly made Kate throw up….. purely accidental of course. We also checked out the Pirates of the Caribbean ride as well as the ‘it’s a small world’ display.

We had that damn tune in our head for HOURS!

Kate didn't look this happy at the end of the ride!

 We then decided to tackle Splash Mountain, well we decided to queue up for Splash Mountain. We would have to wait nearly 2 hrs to ride. 

During the long wait we decided that when the long drop came in the ride we would display the ‘peace’ sign as to try and become more like the locals. I thought I would add my own touch and do the old ‘blue steel’ at the same time. Kate also suggested we try and sit at the back of the boat as that way we wouldn’t get as wet. You can see a copy of the photo below – rest assured I wasn’t asleep, merely looking down. Oh and as far as the whole not getting as wet scenario….. that only works if you are as short as the punters in front of you. As it turned out we unwittingly entered a ‘wet shirt’ competition (which I won :P)

The only thing that was going to top the refreshing ride we had just experienced was an ice cream sundae with added churro. It was delicious, but I am still a little confused as to thinking behind adding cornflakes at the bottom.

By this stage we were well and truly pooped and after a brief stopover at the merchandise store (I soooo want a sorcerer’s apprentice hat!) we jumped on a train to start the journey home. This was rudely interrupted when someone hit the emergency stop about 10 min from Yokohama station. We still don’t know what the hold up, but there was a chap getting most excitable about 10m from us who was then attended by a hostie brandishing a roll of tp and then medics when we reached the station.

Stylin'

Well that’s it for this blog, I am almost as knackered now after writing as I was on Sunday night! I might go put my feet up and watch some more baseball.

Pimpin'

hey batterbatterbatterbatterbatterSWINGbatter!

Welcome back Ninjafans,

My my it has been what feels like an eternity since the last blog……. So much so it is hard to believe we are finally back in Japan!

The good news is that with the exception of some rough smells from off food and stagnant water (nothing a little nilodour wasn’t able to fix) our apartment was in good nick. Kate was lucky enough to be given a day to settle back in so on the Tuesday morning we awoke bright eyed and bushy tailed (perhaps a little bit of an exaggeration….) to get the apartment to a state we would be happy to live in.

My job was to assemble the Ikea furniture we had sent flatpacked over. Towards the evening I was basking in the comfort that I had finished all of the furniture when Kate kindly pointed out one more little box which had my computer chair in it *sigh*…. If it hadn’t been such a worthy cause I may well have suggested it could wait until the Wednesday, but as it stood I finished assembling it. Needless to say if I see an allen key again any time it will be too soon!

Kate had the unenviable task of sorting the closets out. It appeared the kindly chaps at Wridgeways managed to send ALL our clothes over…… and whilst I am happy my Wallabies Bundy Rum onesie made the journey but I am not convinced the opportunity to wear said garment will avail itself any time soon. Bottom line is that anyone coming to visit us should not expect ANY wardrobe space at all!

In addition to sending over enough clothes to sink a battleship the delightful chaps at Wridgeways sent a little box over with the label ‘Wii stuff’ on it. Imagine my disgust when upon opening said box all I found were a handful of games and controllers – no console. I will leave it to you the viewers to imagine the torrent of inane ranting and abuse that followed directed at the parentage, intelligence and poor personal hygiene/habits of said company employees.

Rest assured that is one less Christmas card I have to write this year. No I am not going to buy another Wii. Yes there were tears. Most civil engineers are busy rebuilding stuff up north so rather than building a bridge I went and found some concrete.

Moving along, we have settled in quite well and are waiting on the final few bits and pieces to settle us in. One of those was sorted Friday morning when the cable guy came and installed the cable in the bedroom. Now we need our couch to arrive (next Friday) and we will be hot to trot!

Apart from that, we have done our best to embrace the local way of life with mixed results. Kate has purchased a stylish bike known as a ‘mamachari’. This chic, shleek and shtylish piece of hardware has not been trialled just yet (it arrived Friday morning) but certainly looks comfy. When at the same store as we got this bike, I politely enquired as to whether they would have one to fit someone of my size we received a firm but bashful arms crossed ‘no deal’ sign, followed by some frantic scribbles on paper. Turns out all he was writing was ‘90kgs’ – I guess I could have taken offence to the suggestion that I weigh more than that…… but in fairness who are we kidding!

Thursday night was a highlight insofar as we went to the local baseball stadium to watch our*** team the Yokohama Baystars play Rakuten Eagles. I must say I love the crowds at the sporting events over here. The fans go fairly nuts for their own team and a good portion of the entertainment is watching the crowds. We were lucky enough to be sitting in the ‘cheer squad’ section of the stands last night.

Needless to say we were a little deaf in one ear by the end of the game! Amusingly enough the muso's (and I use the term loosely, apologies to any fans that are REAL muso's) got swapped out every 3rd innings as they were too pooped to continue -- even though they only played when the Baystars were batting!

In the above and left photo's you can see the ringleaders who would dictate what cheer to sing! Something else you don't see everyday was that a chap near us was unfortunate to spill his beer....... Rather than just putting up with a wet smelly floor, he sent his elderly mother/grandmother/friend? to go get a mop and clean it up! Next time I go to the MCG I will have to try that one on Kate!

In anycase, here are some photo's of the baseball........ and it turns out despite the reputation for not being to flash, a 2 run homer in the 6th inning gave the Baystars a big W..........

According to some of the locals here, the reason that the Baystars are not one of the top teams is that their sponsor can't give them enough money to afford the top notch players..... I have a suggestion for them perhaps if they make their pitchers walk from the bullpen instead of driving them in a Toyota MR2 (???) then they could save a few yen! Given their immediate success with our attendance the jury is still out on whether on not we will be supporting them fulltime..

Kate also learnt a nifty little trick from an elderly gentleman whom she described as a 'dirty little scrumhalf' or otherwise known as a 'George Gregan' -- This chap, travelling with his wife in matching hot pink jumpsuits, was on the same train home as us and he was less than convinced that Kate would respond appropriately when 'ENGAGE' was called by the conductors. So, when the doors finally opened he kindly put a guiding forearm into Kates back and started pushing. Not wishing to be separated from the scrum, his wife grabbed a firm handful of his jumpsuit and soon both were safely on the train. The technique displayed was only outshown by the luminescence of their clothing and Kate now grabs a handful of my backpack/shirt whenever we dis/embark trains so that we don't get separated!

Since then the weather has set in due to a cyclone/typhoon that has been mosying up the coast of SE Asia and it has been spitting almost non stop since friday! 

I hope everyone is happy and well wherever you are and we will catch you next time! (I thought I'd leave you with some more fan cheering!)

***Apparently the Baystars are having a season of 'mixed' results and with half of us being a true Weagles supporter there is some concern about supporting a team that is not winning (or abusing substances). The other half of us is an avid Hawthorn supporert and is now used to supporting a team that provides 'mixed' results......